Random Late Night Thoughts

I am starting to get very nervous and anxious for the test results. I wish there was a way to fast-forward. I can kill myself reading information on the internet - all of it tells stories that make me feel queazy. Seriously, google some keywords like - hard, lump, lymph node, cluster, neck, etc. I keep going back to how it just can't be cancer - it can't. The thought of my son, a 2 year old, having cancer is completely insane. 
Geez, I was doing so good until the doctor told us about the cluster of lymph nodes he removed. "Two large ones and a bunch of smaller ones" I haven't done any research on lymphoma because - well, what's the point? No matter what, I still have to wait for results. 
I've been searching for something online which will get rid of this sick feeling in my stomach - I need to find a story about someone who has had a surgical biopsy on their lymph nodes (actual lymph nodes, not lipomas or cysts) and they were over 1cm, hard, stationary and in a cluster. But, here's the catch, I need the story to not end in a cancer diagnosis.
Phoenix's two largest lymph nodes were around 2cm. All were hard and were clustered together in a mass.
They were slow growing though - I'm holding onto that hope. The first one appeared over 2 years ago and it was probably only ⅓ cm, most lymphomas grow SO rapidly. And, he's so young. Pediatric Lymphoma is super rare.
Ethan is convinced he's got cancer. He says that I'm starting to annoy him by saying that it still could be nothing.
When Phoenix was a year old he got a high temperature for 5 days. We had no idea why so the doctor ordered a bunch of tests. They saw a part of his lung that was unclear and they thought it might be pneumonia, the radiologist cleared it though. It turned out Phoenix just had rosela. Now I think back to that unclear spot and wonder if that could be cancer. Phoenix has had a shallow dry cough for months now that we just decided it was allergies - it's not all the time. God, what if he actually has cancer?